|Dust Bunnies Rock Chicago! Help Lyric Fight back with a warehouse cleanup!
DUST BUNNIES ROCK CHICAGO
This just in from the corners of the Lyric Warehouse in Chicago (or close to Chicago anyway). A number of gangster looking, gun toting, noose swinging Dust Bunnies have taken over the Lyric Warehouse! They have thrown lumber everywhere, trashed the paint room, left those darned chairs and tables from the show all over the place, and strewn props and costumes EVERYWHERE! The main warehouse area is a mess, the front room looks like a teenager's bedroom, and the paint room is awash in grey and black hues! It's awful. The meanest Dust Bunny of the gang - Big Bad Billy Phlegm - even pushed our esteemed Warehouse Supervisor Tom O'Brien off a ladder in an effort to stop our Lyric members from regaining control of the warehouse. We must overcome this violent takeover. Here's the plan:
First, let's have Sean look like a dummy and pretend he's Tom and put out a notice about the takeover of the warehouse. However, Mark Cranmer has insisted that Sean not sit on his knee. Fine! He'll do it anyway. Next, we need all hands on deck. The dust bunnies want to not only take over the warehouse but they want to make sure that the Hairspray team can't get started with set construction on time. They heard that auditions were coming up soon so the bunnies are spending their nights messing things up further to try to prevent any more construction activity in the future.
Our first attack on the dust bunnies is this Saturday, April 23rd from 9 am to noon. You can expect to hear cast and crew singing songs permanently embedded in their heads like "We Both Reached For The Screw Gun", "When Roxie Takes Apart The Stand", and "Funny DustBunny" (that one is sure to get those dust bunnies laughing so hard that they too will fall off a ladder - revenge is sweet!).
Assuming that the above renditions of those classic CHICAGO songs go over as expected, for an encore, there will be "All That Dust", "A Little Bit Of Good Screw Sorting" and "Rustie" (a song about some of our oldest screws that are hiding in the far corners of the tool room under previously undetected dust bunnies).
In an early preview, those at the warehouse during strike who were beginning to put away some of the huge pile of wood in the middle of the floor, grabbed some of the jail house pieces and began to perform the "Wood Block Tango". If you arrive early enough and work hard enough at the warehouse takeover, you may hear it again! We can't promise that those performing this number will be as scantily clad as those on the Flynn stage, but we can hope!
The second Take Back The Warehouse event will be Saturday, April 30th, same time, same place. This is the same day that, apparently, those involved with CHICAGO will be gathering in another town that begins with "W" to celebrate their accomplishments in the show. We can't disclose the location in this message as we KNOW the Dust Bunnies are monitoring all communication and we don't want them to show up at the VFW in Winooski for the party. We have a couple of real special treats at the second clean-up. Nora will feature "When You're Good To Bunnies" and the entire cast will belt "Razzle Dazzle Those Bunnies Away" until there are no more fresh dust bunny turds anywhere at 55 LeRoy Drive! We had hoped to feature "Mr. Cellophane" but Phil isn't going to show up and no one would notice anyway! Our finale that day will entertain you and will drive those dust bunnies out of the warehouse for good. Mark Cranmer will perform his special song where he professes his love of sheep - "All I Care About Is Ewe"! We've heard that Serena and Nora are very offended with this perverse song and plan to follow up that number with "No Class" specifically directed at Mark and his wooly friends. It sounds like a greater showdown than when Belinda first showed the set plans for Peter Pan to Vern!
Charlie Church will set his alarm early on those days and will coordinate the efforts at the warehouse. I'm sure he will bring coffee, juice, bagels and donuts for all of us, just like Tom does! Cheri Forsythe will be at the warehouse to keep Charlie awake!
We need everyone to help. As Tom and his Dust Bunnies would sing, "I Just Can't Do It Alone!"